Being Good Listeners

How do you hear God? Do you hear his voice in your head, maybe in your own voice? Do you hear him speak in the thunder? Or in the wind? Perhaps you hear his voice in the words of a friend, or your pastor, or you mother.

…The sheep listen to his voice. He calls his own sheep by name, and leads them out. When he has brought out all his own, he goes on ahead of them, ad his sheep follow him because they know his voice. John 10:3-4

When I was younger I was always fairly certain what to do. I had trained myself to listen for the voice of God, and when I was uncertain I just asked. God always pointed the way. He lived in me, and there was no doubt in me which voice was his.

Then I hit a dark period in life, and God became strangely silent. I prayed. I prayed some more. I cried. I screamed and hollered and yelled my frustration at God, and still he seemed silent. Finally I quit. I waited for the still small voice that we hear so much about. It never came. Instead of waiting to hear, I moved forward, acting on what I knew from scripture. If there were no clear direction I would do what I wanted to. I discovered that God talks to us in a variety of ways.

When my children were very young, I communicated with them in a close and intimate way. I did things with them, guiding them moment-by-moment. As they grew older my direction became less hands on and more directional. I left them lists. I reminded them to think about what they had already been taught. When they became adults they knew they could call me, but they had to rely more on the training they had received, on the knowledge they had been given and on what they knew I would say or direct them to do. If they lacked wisdom, all they had to do was ask.

I have come to believe that God communicates with us like we do with our children. Every child is different, and so every form of communication is different. My relationship with God is different than it was when I was younger, but he has never stopped communicating with me. Sometimes it’s a word from my pastor. Sometimes its clear direction; I just know what I’m supposed to do. Sometimes it’s a word from you, encouraging me or saying exactly what I know he wants me to hear. Sometimes he gives me the desires he wants me to have.

Most of the time it is through his word. As I read and meditate and study I get to know him and his nature better. As I know his nature, I can understand what he would have me do and how he would have me live. I take on the mind of Christ, becoming more like him.

God speaks to all of us. His word is abundantly available, especially here in the United States. The trick is to learn to listen, to apply his word to our lives and to be obedient.

Today, if you hear his voice, do not harden your hearts as you did in the rebellion…See to it, brothers, that none of you has a sinful, unbelieving heart that turns away from the living God. But encourage one another daily, as long as it is called Today, so that none of you may be hardened by sins deceitfulness. 

Hebrews 3:17-18, 12-13

We help each other hear the voice of God. We help each other obey. A young friend of mine worries because she doesn’t feel like she hears God. She belongs to him. He lives in her. It takes time and training to distinguish his voice from the multitude of others that shout into our lives. It is up to her to study to know him. It is up to me to help her.

A Life Without Regret

As you lay on your deathbed, what thoughts will go through your mind? Will it be filled with warm memories of a life well lived? Will it be filled with thoughts of people you loved, and who love you? Will it be filled with pleasure, or will it be filled with regret?

My guess is that most of us will have a combination of all of these. I don’t have a lot of regrets. Part of that is because I believe that our mistakes are part of our becoming the person that we are. I’ve certainly made my share of mistakes. I do have a few regrets. I regret that I didn’t stick up for myself more when I was younger. Mostly I regret that I didn’t take the time to be kinder.

Now, I am not by nature an unkind person. I am, however, a busy person. I am a fixer, a doer, someone who listens with action in mind. When I was younger, there were always a million things that needed to be done, a child who needed attending to, a church program that needed working, a meal that needed cooking or a room that needed cleaning. I was always in a hurry. I wish I had listened more. I wish I had taken time to sit in the park and listen to the lonely mother, or the grandmother. I wish that when I had taken a meal to a sick friend I had stopped for a moment to listen.

 Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good to all people, especially to those who belong to the family of believers. Galatians 6:9-10

I know that sometimes I got tired of being sensitive to every one else’s needs. Sometimes I had a misguided sense of what was important. There were clothes that needed washing and dinners to cook. Maybe I would have taught my kids better about what was really important if I had stopped for a minute, and done a kind thing. Mostly I regret the relationships I missed out on or slighted by not taking the time to be kind.One author says that true love equals listening. People want to be heard. People need to be heard.

God gives us to each other, to help each other, to lift each other up. We are also given to each other for our benefit, to remind us that while sometimes we are the giver, other times we are the receivers of relationship, of compassion and kindness, of help. Sometimes when we stop and take a minute to listen or to reach out in compassion, the one we really help is us. When we fail to do the kind thing, when we are too busy to stop and listen, the one who loses is us. And the other person.

Heaven is made up of the Body of Christ, you and me, living in eternal relationship. The laundry and the job and the errands and the programs are temporal. You and I are eternal. When we do good, when we are kinder and more sensitive, when we love, we are investing in the eternal. When we set aside ourselves and our excuses, we live into the perfect eternity that we are already a part of.

When I die, will my tombstone say, “This wasn’t on her to-do list,” or will it say, “She loved well.” I’m learning to live for the latter.

Who's voice are you listening to?

“My soul waits in silence for God only; From Him is my salvation.”  Psalm 62:1

            Elijah had experienced a stunning victory on Mount Carmel.  God had shown Himself in all His power when He accepted Elijah’s sacrifice and the gods of the other prophets had not accepted theirs.  He had ordered the people to seize the false prophets of Baal and had put them all to death.  Jezebel, the Queen, was not pleased and had vowed to do the same to Elijah.  Rather than riding high on his success, Elijah was first afraid, then depressed to the point of wanting to die.  Instead of rebuking him, God ministered to Elijah, first feeding and then empowering him.  Elijah used his supernatural strength to find a cave and sought direction.

            God came to Elijah.  First came a wind so strong that it broke pieces off the mountain.  Then came an earthquake, and then fire.  Elijah recognized that God was not in any of these huge manifestations of power.  When Elijah heard a gentle breeze, he covered his face. He knew that God was there.  Elijah had learned to listen for and recognize the voice of God.  It was not in the noisy show of power, it was in the quiet.  I wonder how many hours Elijah had spent in silence, learning to recognize the voice of God. 

            Mahatma Gandhi set every Monday aside as a day of silence.  He said that he needed the stillness to rest his vocal cords and to promote an inner harmony in his soul amid the turmoil around him.  What was he listening to, I wonder.      The Psalmist says that our soul should wait in silence for God alone.  Only in Him is salvation found.  Jesus Himself often took time alone to talk with and listen to God.  He said that His sheep would recognize His voice.

            I do not often hear the audible voice of God.  Would we recognize it if we heard it?  Our days are filled with cell phones ringing and stereos playing and televisions blaring.  We need to find some silence to learn to hear and recognize the voice of God.  He can only lead us if we are following His voice.  He can only use us as we are willing to follow His direction. 

            The voice of God can lead us if we are willing to follow.  It can save us if we are willing to respond.  The voice of God can change us.  We must be willing to listen.

Wisdom and Understanding

Today is my mom’s 81^st birthday. If you asked her, she would tell you that she doesn’t feel 81 years old. She would tell you that she still feels like the 16 year old girl she was on the inside. Her theory is that because the soul is eternal, it doesn’t age, and so we don’t feel older. She is what I want to be when I am 81 years old. She is active and adventurous, and learning new things all the time. She is also wise.

Is not wisdom found among the aged?

Does not long life bring understanding? Job 12:12

Our culture worships youth. Watch TV for any length of time and you will see advertisements for liposuction, hair dye, or tummy tucks. We strive to extend the experiences of youth as long as possible, working to stay healthy and extend our stamina. A wrinkle at the corner of our mouth or a stray laugh line is reason for panic.

There is nothing wrong with wanting to look attractive or striving to stay healthy. There is something deeply wrong with discounting the value of the wisdom that only comes with living a long life. There is a lot to be said for the understanding that comes from experience.

We don’t have to make every mistake ourselves. We can learn from the experiences of those who made their own, and lived to share them. We can learn from the wisdom of people God has put in our lives.

When was the last time you listened to the stories the older people in your life tell? There is wisdom hiding there. Have you asked the opinion of that elderly aunt, the one who knits doilies and smells like lavender? There may be understanding that you never knew existed. We waste their wisdom when we don’t bother to ask, or when we discount them simply because they are old or seem out of touch. Just because they struggle with their smart phone doesn’t mean they don’t have understanding to offer. They understand complexities and relationships that we may have never learned about.

Happy birthday, Mom.  Thank you. You’ve given me good genes, a good mind, and have lived a life of faith that is an example for me to follow. You live wisdom and understanding, and God has blessed me by putting you in my life. 81 years isn’t enough. I am so thankful that you are healthy, and that we have more time together. You are a gift.